the 7 y/o boy who lives next door doesn’t want to go in the house to bed and i just heard his dad use the old “you live under my roof, you live by my rules” and the kid just shouted back “im not under your roof im under the sky and thats god’s roof and he wants me to play out for longer!”
i can’t stop laughing.
update: now he’s scootering down the street singing ‘we didn’t start the fire’ while his dad chases him
can we stop the hate on whites too please can’t we just hate on the people that actually commit unacceptable acts instead of general groups of people
How to tell if it was a gunshot or fireworks: gunshots don’t echo, fireworks do.
thaNK YOU SO MUCH
the fact that anyone might commonly need to know this terrifies me
clearly you’re not from america
ferguson rly teaches a lesson in the lengths police will go to protect each other and white supremacy. they’d rather do all this than arrest one man.
because he is a cop, and he’s white.
they ‘have each other’s backs’ so doggedly and determinedly that they would sacrifice a town of black people for one white cop
okay but when you have holocaust survivors and people who were activists during the civil rights movement supporting mike brown and then KKK members and neo nazi’s supporting the officer you should be able to figure out which side is the right one.
ok so this just hit me
humidifiers fill the air with water molecules from a source of water.
so what if someone filled a humidifier with holy water. would this essentially cleanse a room of all evil?
Either demons aren’t real, or demons are afraid because humans keep coming up with $40 solutions to demon problems.
i wish noah had swatted the two mosquitoes from his ark
this really cute customer came in today and i asked him how he was paying and he said ‘hasta la visa baby’ and then he blushed and cleared his throat and was like ‘um.. visa please’ and i kinda wanna marry him
you don’t realise how much tumblr has changed your view on things until you spend time with friends who don’t have tumblr and they say something and you’re just like
I am a pretty patient person but if there is one thing I will lose my shit over almost instantly it’s my computer/internet being slow my tolerance level is exactly 0 for that shit man I did my time in the 90’s/2000’s I don’t need any of this garbage
"I did my time" damn straight
Dresses are so nice they’re just tubes of fabric you can throw on with very little effort and when you wear one and people are like “oh wow you dressed up you look really nice” but it’s like
ah yes my disguise is working. you think i cared this morning